I AM WHAT I AM ...

In response to a recent addition I made to my Facebook wall, my friend Bubba noted that I am a ... "Creature of Habit".  Once again, my good friend knows me quite well.

I have always been a fan of ... ME.  I remember way back in High School -- which at this point in my life is "way back" -- that the then "love of my life" -- Weiner -- was critical of some action on my part & told me bluntly I was "selfish", along with acting ... "better than everyone".  OUCH !! 

I came to realize years ago that Weiner was spot-on when it came to her description of me. As much as I like people & enjoy doing things with others, I really seem to function best with ... ME.  I have a list of damaged & destroyed relationships which would be evidence of that statement. 

I know after my heart surgery more than four years ago, I retracted into being a recluse in many ways.  Part of it was the life altering process I had just been through & some of it had to be me realizing I was "forcing" some relationships.

I have read where there is some belief the stopping of ones heart in the surgery process affects many of the bodies organs, especially the brain. I've adopted that as a valid "excuse" for some of my actions since then.  As for how I acted & felt before the surgery ... well ... I guess that was just ... ME.

Since I seem to be my biggest fan, along with knowing I function best as a single, I have found that indulging myself in my habits, hobbies & interests is often my best reward for living & feeling as I do.  Money can buy happiness.

I was in Memphis this past Friday & I took the opportunity to visit one of my favorite retail outlets in that city:  ART CENTER SUPPLY.  It's a large store which has in stock & sells everything anyone would be looking for in the world of art.  For me, that would be pens & paper.

I can truly say, through all the many years I have been visiting this store, not once(t) have I ever left without having purchased ... something.  Leaving empty handed has never occurred.  Nor, have I ever uttered the words ... "Thanks, but I was just looking".

So once again last Friday, I indulged my passion for pens & markers.  I know I have hundreds of same already, but they are something I use & enjoy, so I bought more.  I am not hurting anyone & no ones feelings are being affected because of my actions.  I am just bringing happiness to my favorite person ... ME. 

Don't get me wrong.  I enjoy my life & feel I have been blessed in it.  I feel I have earned my life style & as long as I do no harm to others, I am comfortable being a ... "Creature of Habit".